Marya Hornbacher
London: Flamingo, 1999; £P6.99 (paperback)
ISBN 0006550894

One cannot readily identify and empathise with masochism. Psychological disorders that manifest in self abuse go against the grain, against our instincts for survival and protection. Hornbacher's memoir shows how a "normal" desire to conform can be kicked into overdrive, how the perception of an imperfect self can lead to gratuitously violent bouts of bingeing, vomiting, and starvation.

An autobiographical account of anorexia and bulimia, Wasted is painful to read; it is painful to watch someone with obvious talent break their body time after time. Anorexia and bulimia have come into the public eye recently, but this account takes us deeper than the Hello! magazine features. The rhetoric leaves you cold, and the book is made even more frightening by the marrying of scientific research to the author's first-hand account. She strips bare the lies told by so many sufferers, the ignorance of the medical profession, and the way in which diet pervades our lives. Her account will silence any critic and stagger all those, like me, with a naive perception of self harm.

The book gives an insight into eating disorders, a patient's view, but unlike most medical texts, it does not pretend to give any answers. Identifying the causes, prevention, and changes in attitude that are necessary to overcome this mechanism to self destruct, are beyond the scope of Wasted. The hope is that by giving this raw insight, it will drag the readers away from catwalk glamour and give them a grounding in the short life of a girl who, even now, lives under the shadow of relapse.