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I first realised I had a problem when one day, on the way to university, I saw the cleaning lady for the block and stopped for a chat. She has a strong Irish accent and I have to concentrate very hard to make out what she is saying. We began by showing our mutual disappointment with the weather by looking heavenward and shrugging, she then launched in to a monologue. My eyes narrowed as I attempted to get the gist of her ramblings. I could only make out one word ... anniversary. I smiled and heartily congratulated her. She looked puzzled, paused, and then in crystal clear tones said: "It doesn't seem that long since he tragically died." My face dropped and I prayed I would be swallowed up by the ground underneath me.

It dawned on me that this was not simply a "one off" event but was occuring with alarming regularity in my life. My family and friends have been very understanding and supportive. They have told me that I have always been an embarrassment to them as long as they can remember but they still love me. They kindly reminded me that during one of my medical interviews, while I was explaining why I wanted to be a doctor, a gigantic spit ball emanated from my mouth and shot across the room landing on the interviewer's hand.

I take some comfort knowing that I am in good company. One high profile sufferer is Cherie Blair, who a couple of days after moving in to number 10 Downing Street, inadvertently opened the door to the world paparazzi in her nightie.

The condition has caused me a great deal of mental anguish and compelled me to visit Christine, a leading authority on astrology. She quickly chalked the condition down to me being a Libra. According to her this means that I am charming, have tendencies towards hypochondria, and curiously makes me a dab hand with raffia-work. None of which I think particularly sums me up. She drew up my chart, then after thinking long and hard, looked at me gravely and urged me keep away from electrical equipment, traffic, and the elderly.

I am taking one day at a time and it is cathartic sharing this with you. Hopefully I will have this condition conquered before I take to the wards. It's been helpful too meeting fellow sufferers at a support group. One young man told of his experience in a Spanish restaurant. He attempted to impress his date by ordering in Spanish. He did so fluently and both him and his date were rather moved by his theatrical performance. And so you can imagine his surprise when he discovered that the dusky waiter was not in fact from Spain at all, but from Birmingham, and could not understand a word he had uttered. He is a Libra too.